Beginning or end? You decide!

My morning started with a walk. 

My intention was to use my walk as prayer time. Walking with Jesus, so to speak. While I was listening to my favourite playlist, I was concentrating more on watching out for cars and planning my route.  

I had a lot to ask. But surely God knew. He sees my pain, He knows my doubts, and still, He remains silent! 

Why Lord? I hate why seasons. Why can I not see the bigger picture? Why can I not figure out what I am supposed to learn from this?
I was frustrated because I did not understand why this was happening to me. I was thinking of what I was missing. What should I be changing about myself? 

All these what and why questions made me feel more hopeless. I am so far from where I need to be, and it seems that I will never reach the place I am supposed to be. 

Oh Lord, will I stay in this desert forever?

I was nearing the last stretch of my walk. I could see my house in the distance. It was so close, but I was tired. I felt my calves burning, my feet dragging. I can not do this. Not only that, but I am absolutely not doing this again tomorrow. Why did I want to do this? 

And then I heard the Lord speak. He asked me to look at the short distance ahead of me. He asked me to consider the distance I completed. The Lord spoke to me about the season I was in. He asked me to reconsider, the season I was in. Did I find myself at the beginning of the desert or the end?

I remember the dark, hopeless places I have been in before. The Lord was faithful. He carried me, restored me. When I thought it was over, there was a but God moment. 

I thought if I was able to walk to this point, then I will have the strength to complete my walk. God wanted me to hold on. 

While listening to His voice for confirmation, I suddenly realised I was standing in front of my house. I did not realise the progress I was making while I was talking to Jesus. 

And then it dawned on me. The enemy will most likely attack at the end of the road. When we are weak and tired. 

I needed to change my perspective on this season. This was not the start of my journey!  I was about to step out of this desert and into the promise. I was not at the beginning, I was nearing the end!

Everything before this moment was preparation. And if I just keep talking to Jesus, I will reach the point of rest! 

Before my walk, I saw myself in the middle of a desert. Weak, tired, not knowing if I will make it to the end. How will I do this?

But now I know this is not the beginning! It is the end! The end of bondage and slavery! 

Numbers 13:33 - The enemy wants you to see yourself defeated, unable to!  

It is time to break out of those chains. Walk out of that desert. See the end, do not return to the beginning!